Are you a minister, pastor, church worker, or leader who lives in Ibadan? You are cordially invited to “Equip” a Minister’s Conference with Rev Femi Oduwole and Rev Gbeminiyi Eboda as part of our 9th anniversary convention.
Rev Dunamis and Sophia Okunowo will also be hosting us. Attendance is free, but registration is required. Kindly register HERE
Don’t miss it. Spread the word!
To my future wife, whoever and wherever you are—this letter is for you. Though we may not yet know each other, I want to speak honestly about the journey ahead of us. Marriage is a sacred covenant, not just between two people but also with God (Malachi 2:14). It requires preparation, humility, and intentionality from both sides. So before our paths cross or our vows unite us, let me ask: Are you really ready for me?
1. Are You Ready to Partner in Purpose?
Marriage isn’t just about romance—it’s about partnership. Amos 3:3 asks, “Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?” Before we can walk side by side, we must first agree on the direction we’re heading. Are you pursuing God’s purpose for your life? Do you understand that marriage amplifies ministry, calling us to serve Him together as one? If we’re both aligned with His will, our union won’t just be a relationship—it’ll be a mission field.
2. Are You Ready to Embrace Imperfection?
Let’s get real—I’m far from perfect. Neither of us will enter this marriage without flaws, struggles, or areas where growth is needed. Ephesians 4:2 calls us to bear with one another in love, “being completely humble and gentle.” Can you embrace my imperfections while challenging me to become better? Likewise, am I willing to do the same for you? Love isn’t blind; it sees clearly yet chooses to stay committed through grace and forgiveness.
3. Are You Ready to Communicate Openly?
Healthy communication is the backbone of any strong marriage. James 1:19 reminds us to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry. Are you ready to share your heart vulnerably, even when it feels uncomfortable? Will you extend patience when misunderstandings arise? Honest dialogue fosters trust, intimacy, and unity—the pillars of a thriving relationship.
4. Are You Ready to Prioritize God Above All Else?
Our marriage won’t succeed if it’s built solely on feelings or convenience—it must be rooted in God. Matthew 6:33 tells us to seek first His kingdom, and everything else will fall into place. As much as I long to love and cherish you, nothing should come before my relationship with Christ—and the same must be true for you. When God is at the center, our love becomes unshakeable because it’s anchored in eternity.
5. Are You Ready to Fight Together?
Marriage isn’t always easy; there will be seasons of joy and seasons of struggle. But here’s the truth: We won’t fight against each other—we’ll fight for each other. Ecclesiastes 4:12 says, “A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” With God binding us together, we’ll face challenges as a team. Are you prepared to stand firm, pray fervently, and never give up—even when the road gets tough?
Final Thought:
My dearest future wife, I write these words not to intimidate but to inspire. Marriage is a beautiful journey, but it demands readiness—from both of us. As you prepare your heart for this lifelong commitment, remember that love is more than a feeling; it’s a choice, a sacrifice, and a reflection of God’s unwavering devotion to us.
If you’re reading this, take courage. Whether we meet tomorrow or years from now, I trust that God is preparing you just as He’s preparing me. Let’s commit to seeking Him above all else, knowing that He will guide our steps toward each other in His perfect timing. Until then, keep growing, keep praying, and keep believing—for the best is yet to come.
Some days, love feels like butterflies. Other days, it feels like a sacrifice. If you think godly love is just about how you feel, you’ll walk away the moment the feelings fade.
The truth is, love that lasts is not always powered by emotion; it’s powered by intention.
Feelings come and go. They rise and fall with mood, stress, seasons, and even hormones. But real love, the kind God talks about, is deeper than that. It shows up when it’s hard. It stays when it’s uncomfortable. It chooses even when it doesn’t feel like it.
1 Corinthians 13 doesn’t say love is a feeling. It says love is patient, kind, not easily angered, keeps no record of wrongs. Those aren’t emotions. They’re decisions. Daily decisions.
You won’t always “feel” in love, and that’s okay. What matters is what you do in those moments. Do you still choose to honor? To forgive? To pray for them? To show up? That’s godly love.
You see, culture tells us to follow our hearts. But God says to guard it (Proverbs 4:23). Feelings are unstable in everything, especially in relationships.
Even Jesus didn’t feel like going to the cross. He prayed, “If it be possible, let this cup pass from me” (Matthew 26:39), but love made Him stay. Love made Him choose obedience. That’s what godly love looks like. It’s a decision to honor God even when it’s uncomfortable.
Commitment is the only virtue that will take you further than chemistry, so you won’t always wake up with butterflies. I encourage you to choose love, not just when it feels good, but when it reflects Christ.
Love is multifaceted, and when it’s genuine, it manifests in ways that reflect the heart of God. True love isn’t just about feelings or grand gestures—it’s about consistent, selfless actions that demonstrate care, commitment, and character. Here are five types of lovers who truly embody what it means to love deeply and authentically.
1. The Servant Lover
A servant lover prioritizes the needs of their partner above their own desires. Inspired by Jesus’ example of washing His disciples’ feet (John 13:14-15), this type of lover finds joy in serving and supporting their spouse. Whether it’s cooking a meal, running errands, or simply listening after a long day, they show love through practical acts of kindness. Philippians 2:3-4 captures this mindset perfectly: “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility, value others above yourselves.” A servant lover builds trust and creates a foundation of mutual respect.
2. The Faithful Lover
Faithfulness is the hallmark of a lover who truly loves. This person remains steadfast through life’s ups and downs, refusing to give up when challenges arise. Ecclesiastes 9:9 encourages husbands to enjoy life with their wives “all the days of this meaningless life” because faithfulness honors both God and the covenant of marriage. The faithful lover keeps their promises, resists temptation, and chooses loyalty even when circumstances are tough. Their unwavering commitment becomes a safe haven for their partner.
3. The Encouraging Lover
An encouraging lover sees the best in their partner and actively affirms their strengths, dreams, and potential. They understand the power of words to build up or tear down (Proverbs 18:21) and use their speech to inspire confidence and hope. When struggles arise, they remind their spouse of God’s faithfulness and encourage them not to lose heart. Hebrews 10:24-25 says, “Let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.” An encouraging lover empowers their partner to grow spiritually, emotionally, and relationally.
4. The Sacrificial Lover
True love involves sacrifice—a willingness to lay down personal comfort, time, or preferences for the sake of the other. Ephesians 5:25 calls husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church—by giving Himself up for her. But sacrificial love isn’t limited to husbands; anyone can embody this principle. A sacrificial lover puts aside selfishness, forgives readily, and invests deeply in their partner’s well-being. Their love reflects the ultimate sacrifice of Jesus, who gave everything for us.
5. The Praying Lover
A praying lover understands the spiritual dimension of love and consistently seeks God on behalf of their relationship. They recognize that human effort alone cannot sustain a marriage or partnership—it requires divine intervention. James 5:16 reminds us, “The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.” By praying together and individually, the praying lover invites God into every aspect of their union. They intercede during trials, thank God for blessings, and ask for wisdom to navigate challenges. This kind of love is rooted in dependence on God and strengthens the bond between partners.
These five types of lovers—servant, faithful, encouraging, sacrificial, and praying—are united by their commitment to loving well. Each one reflects a facet of God’s unconditional love for us, reminding us that true love is less about romance and more about action.
If you want to be a lover who truly loves, consider which of these qualities you can cultivate further in your relationships. Whether you’re married, dating, or preparing for future relationships, strive to model Christlike love in all you do. After all, love is not just something we feel—it’s something we live out daily, leaving an eternal impact on those around us.
As 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 beautifully describes, love is patient, kind, enduring, and hopeful. May you embrace these qualities and become the kind of lover who reflects God’s heart to the world.
You started the relationship with joy. The butterflies were flying, prayers were loud, and everything felt like a dream come true.
But slowly, your devotion to God started fading. Your prayer life grew cold. The fire you once had started burning low, all because of love.
Get on the seat and let’s gist. Look, it’s easy to get so caught up in someone that you forget the One who gave them to you.
Dating was never supposed to pull you away from God; it’s supposed to pull you both closer to Him. Any relationship that weakens your spiritual life is not a blessing; it’s a distraction.
Romans 12:11 says, “Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord.” That means even while dating, your fire should still be burning. Your altar should still be alive.
If your relationship is costing you your connection with God, it’s too expensive. Love shouldn’t make you skip devotionals. It shouldn’t make you hide. It shouldn’t silence your convictions. True love doesn’t compete with God.
Don’t fall for the lie that says, “It’s just a season” or “It will get better.” Many have carried spiritual dryness into marriage because they never checked it during dating.
Pray together, yes. Also, pray alone.
Talk about your future, yes. Also, grow in your personal walk.
Love them deeply, but love God deeper.
You don’t have to choose between love and fire. You can have both when the relationship is built on the right foundation.
So, if you feel your fire slipping;
Pause
Reconnect
Return to your first love.
No matter how amazing they are, only God can satisfy your soul. You’re not just dating for fun, you’re dating for purpose, and purpose starts with staying connected to the One who holds it all together.
Marriage is a beautiful journey, but it’s not without its challenges, especially when it comes to understanding and navigating the complex emotions of your wife. Women are multifaceted beings, and their emotional depth can sometimes feel overwhelming or confusing to their husbands. However, with patience, empathy, and wisdom rooted in Scripture, you can create a safe space for her emotions while strengthening your relationship.
1. Acknowledge That Emotions Are Valid
Your wife’s feelings are real, even if they don’t always align with logic or your perspective. Psalm 56:8 reminds us that God collects our tears in a bottle, showing His deep care for our emotions. Instead of dismissing her feelings as “overreacting” or “irrational,” validate them by saying things like, “I hear you,” or “That sounds really hard.” Validation doesn’t mean agreement—it means acknowledging her experience and letting her know she’s heard.
2. Listen More Than You Speak
One of the greatest gifts you can give your wife is your undivided attention. James 1:19 encourages us to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry. When your wife shares her emotions, resist the urge to offer solutions or defend yourself immediately. Sometimes, she just needs someone to listen—to hold space for her pain, frustration, or joy. Listening builds trust and shows her that you value her heart.
3. Understand Hormonal and Emotional Influences
There are biological factors—such as hormonal fluctuations during menstruation, pregnancy, or menopause—that can heighten emotions. While these changes aren’t an excuse for sinful behavior, they do affect mood and communication. Educate yourself about these cycles so you can approach her with compassion rather than frustration. Remember, Ephesians 4:32 calls us to be kind and tenderhearted toward one another.
4. Ask Questions to Understand Her Heart
If you’re unsure why your wife feels a certain way, gently ask questions to gain insight. For example, “Can you help me understand what’s making you feel this way?” or “What would make you feel supported right now?” This demonstrates humility and a desire to connect on a deeper level. Proverbs 20:5 says, “The purposes of a person’s heart are deep waters, but one who has insight draws them out.” Be the person who seeks to draw out her heart with care.
5. Pray for Wisdom and Patience
Navigating emotions requires supernatural wisdom and patience—qualities only God can provide. James 1:5 promises that if we ask for wisdom, God will give it generously. Pray specifically for discernment to understand your wife’s needs and for the self-control to respond lovingly, even when emotions run high. Invite her to pray with you, too; shared prayer strengthens unity and invites God into the situation.
6. Avoid Taking It Personally
Sometimes, your wife’s emotions may stem from external stressors, past wounds, or internal struggles—not necessarily something you’ve done. Resist the temptation to take her feelings personally or react defensively. Colossians 3:13 urges us to bear with each other and forgive as the Lord forgave us. Extend grace and remember that her emotions aren’t always a reflection of your worth as a husband.
7. Affirm Her Strengths and Beauty
Words have immense power to heal or hurt. Regularly affirm your wife’s strengths, beauty, and contributions to your marriage. Proverbs 31:28-29 paints a picture of a husband praising his wife: “Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her.” Compliments and encouragement remind her of her value and help soften moments of tension.
Final Thought:
Navigating your wife’s emotions isn’t about fixing everything—it’s about being present, patient, and loving through the ups and downs. By seeking to understand her heart, validating her feelings, and leaning on God’s guidance, you’ll foster a deeper connection and create a home filled with love and safety.
Remember, marriage is a partnership where both individuals bring unique perspectives and experiences. As you navigate the complexities of emotion together, trust that God is shaping you both into better versions of yourselves and drawing you closer to Him and each other.
