Are you a minister, pastor, church worker, or leader who lives in Ibadan? You are cordially invited to “Equip” a Minister’s Conference with Rev Femi Oduwole and Rev Gbeminiyi Eboda as part of our 9th anniversary convention.
Rev Dunamis and Sophia Okunowo will also be hosting us. Attendance is free, but registration is required. Kindly register HERE
Don’t miss it. Spread the word!
To my future wife, whoever and wherever you are—this letter is for you. Though we may not yet know each other, I want to speak honestly about the journey ahead of us. Marriage is a sacred covenant, not just between two people but also with God (Malachi 2:14). It requires preparation, humility, and intentionality from both sides. So before our paths cross or our vows unite us, let me ask: Are you really ready for me?
1. Are You Ready to Partner in Purpose?
Marriage isn’t just about romance—it’s about partnership. Amos 3:3 asks, “Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?” Before we can walk side by side, we must first agree on the direction we’re heading. Are you pursuing God’s purpose for your life? Do you understand that marriage amplifies ministry, calling us to serve Him together as one? If we’re both aligned with His will, our union won’t just be a relationship—it’ll be a mission field.
2. Are You Ready to Embrace Imperfection?
Let’s get real—I’m far from perfect. Neither of us will enter this marriage without flaws, struggles, or areas where growth is needed. Ephesians 4:2 calls us to bear with one another in love, “being completely humble and gentle.” Can you embrace my imperfections while challenging me to become better? Likewise, am I willing to do the same for you? Love isn’t blind; it sees clearly yet chooses to stay committed through grace and forgiveness.
3. Are You Ready to Communicate Openly?
Healthy communication is the backbone of any strong marriage. James 1:19 reminds us to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry. Are you ready to share your heart vulnerably, even when it feels uncomfortable? Will you extend patience when misunderstandings arise? Honest dialogue fosters trust, intimacy, and unity—the pillars of a thriving relationship.
4. Are You Ready to Prioritize God Above All Else?
Our marriage won’t succeed if it’s built solely on feelings or convenience—it must be rooted in God. Matthew 6:33 tells us to seek first His kingdom, and everything else will fall into place. As much as I long to love and cherish you, nothing should come before my relationship with Christ—and the same must be true for you. When God is at the center, our love becomes unshakeable because it’s anchored in eternity.
5. Are You Ready to Fight Together?
Marriage isn’t always easy; there will be seasons of joy and seasons of struggle. But here’s the truth: We won’t fight against each other—we’ll fight for each other. Ecclesiastes 4:12 says, “A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” With God binding us together, we’ll face challenges as a team. Are you prepared to stand firm, pray fervently, and never give up—even when the road gets tough?
Final Thought:
My dearest future wife, I write these words not to intimidate but to inspire. Marriage is a beautiful journey, but it demands readiness—from both of us. As you prepare your heart for this lifelong commitment, remember that love is more than a feeling; it’s a choice, a sacrifice, and a reflection of God’s unwavering devotion to us.
If you’re reading this, take courage. Whether we meet tomorrow or years from now, I trust that God is preparing you just as He’s preparing me. Let’s commit to seeking Him above all else, knowing that He will guide our steps toward each other in His perfect timing. Until then, keep growing, keep praying, and keep believing—for the best is yet to come.
Are you a minister, pastor, church worker, or leader, and do you live in Ibadan? You are cordially invited to “Equip” a Minister’s Conference with Rev Femi Oduwole and Rev Gbeminiyi Eboda as part of our 9th anniversary convention.
Rev Dunamis and Sophia Okunowo will also be hosting us. Attendance is free, but registration is required. Kindly register HERE
Don’t miss it. Spread the word!
One of the most powerful yet simple acts a couple can engage in is praying together. In a world where marriages are constantly under pressure, prayer becomes a binding force that strengthens not only your relationship with God but also with each other. Prayer invites God into the center of your relationship, aligning your hearts and goals with His will.
The scriptures remind us of the power of agreement in prayer:
Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven.”(Matthew 18:19, ESV)
This verse isn’t just about agreement in general, but it speaks specifically to the kind of unity that comes when two people seek God by praying together. When a husband and wife come together before God, they cultivate spiritual intimacy, which naturally spills over into emotional and physical connection.
Many couples underestimate how prayer transforms conflict. When disagreements arise, as they inevitably will, prayer shifts the focus from “who’s right” to “what’s righteous.” It humbles both hearts, encouraging forgiveness and grace.
This is why James said
Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.James 5:16 (NIV)
When you pray with your spouse, you are not only fighting for your marriage but also modeling a godly union that your children and others can look up to. You show that your relationship is not based merely on feelings or circumstances but on the unchanging foundation of God’s Word.
A study by the National Association of Marriage Enhancement found that less than 1% of couples who pray together daily end up divorcing. That statistic isn’t magic; it’s the fruit of prioritizing God together. Prayer opens the door to God’s peace, wisdom, and strength, which are all necessary for navigating the ups and downs of life and marriage.
Take a few minutes today to hold your spouse’s hand and talk to God together. You don’t need fancy words, just a sincere heart. Thank Him for each other, lift up your needs, ask for His guidance, and declare His promises over your marriage.
A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.Ecclesiastes 4:12 (NLT)
Let Christ be that third strand in your marriage. When you pray together, you braid your love with God’s power—and that is not easily broken.
This message is for singles, too. Now is the time to build your altar of prayer. Let God shape your heart, your desires, and your expectations. Pray for your future spouse, even if you haven’t met them yet. Ask God to prepare you to be the kind of partner who brings spiritual strength into a marriage. A strong foundation in prayer while you’re single will prepare you to thrive in unity when you’re joined with another.
Some days, love feels like butterflies. Other days, it feels like a sacrifice. If you think godly love is just about how you feel, you’ll walk away the moment the feelings fade.
The truth is, love that lasts is not always powered by emotion; it’s powered by intention.
Feelings come and go. They rise and fall with mood, stress, seasons, and even hormones. But real love, the kind God talks about, is deeper than that. It shows up when it’s hard. It stays when it’s uncomfortable. It chooses even when it doesn’t feel like it.
1 Corinthians 13 doesn’t say love is a feeling. It says love is patient, kind, not easily angered, keeps no record of wrongs. Those aren’t emotions. They’re decisions. Daily decisions.
You won’t always “feel” in love, and that’s okay. What matters is what you do in those moments. Do you still choose to honor? To forgive? To pray for them? To show up? That’s godly love.
You see, culture tells us to follow our hearts. But God says to guard it (Proverbs 4:23). Feelings are unstable in everything, especially in relationships.
Even Jesus didn’t feel like going to the cross. He prayed, “If it be possible, let this cup pass from me” (Matthew 26:39), but love made Him stay. Love made Him choose obedience. That’s what godly love looks like. It’s a decision to honor God even when it’s uncomfortable.
Commitment is the only virtue that will take you further than chemistry, so you won’t always wake up with butterflies. I encourage you to choose love, not just when it feels good, but when it reflects Christ.
Marriage is a beautiful journey, but it’s not without its challenges, especially when it comes to understanding and navigating the complex emotions of your wife. Women are multifaceted beings, and their emotional depth can sometimes feel overwhelming or confusing to their husbands. However, with patience, empathy, and wisdom rooted in Scripture, you can create a safe space for her emotions while strengthening your relationship.
1. Acknowledge That Emotions Are Valid
Your wife’s feelings are real, even if they don’t always align with logic or your perspective. Psalm 56:8 reminds us that God collects our tears in a bottle, showing His deep care for our emotions. Instead of dismissing her feelings as “overreacting” or “irrational,” validate them by saying things like, “I hear you,” or “That sounds really hard.” Validation doesn’t mean agreement—it means acknowledging her experience and letting her know she’s heard.
2. Listen More Than You Speak
One of the greatest gifts you can give your wife is your undivided attention. James 1:19 encourages us to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry. When your wife shares her emotions, resist the urge to offer solutions or defend yourself immediately. Sometimes, she just needs someone to listen—to hold space for her pain, frustration, or joy. Listening builds trust and shows her that you value her heart.
3. Understand Hormonal and Emotional Influences
There are biological factors—such as hormonal fluctuations during menstruation, pregnancy, or menopause—that can heighten emotions. While these changes aren’t an excuse for sinful behavior, they do affect mood and communication. Educate yourself about these cycles so you can approach her with compassion rather than frustration. Remember, Ephesians 4:32 calls us to be kind and tenderhearted toward one another.
4. Ask Questions to Understand Her Heart
If you’re unsure why your wife feels a certain way, gently ask questions to gain insight. For example, “Can you help me understand what’s making you feel this way?” or “What would make you feel supported right now?” This demonstrates humility and a desire to connect on a deeper level. Proverbs 20:5 says, “The purposes of a person’s heart are deep waters, but one who has insight draws them out.” Be the person who seeks to draw out her heart with care.
5. Pray for Wisdom and Patience
Navigating emotions requires supernatural wisdom and patience—qualities only God can provide. James 1:5 promises that if we ask for wisdom, God will give it generously. Pray specifically for discernment to understand your wife’s needs and for the self-control to respond lovingly, even when emotions run high. Invite her to pray with you, too; shared prayer strengthens unity and invites God into the situation.
6. Avoid Taking It Personally
Sometimes, your wife’s emotions may stem from external stressors, past wounds, or internal struggles—not necessarily something you’ve done. Resist the temptation to take her feelings personally or react defensively. Colossians 3:13 urges us to bear with each other and forgive as the Lord forgave us. Extend grace and remember that her emotions aren’t always a reflection of your worth as a husband.
7. Affirm Her Strengths and Beauty
Words have immense power to heal or hurt. Regularly affirm your wife’s strengths, beauty, and contributions to your marriage. Proverbs 31:28-29 paints a picture of a husband praising his wife: “Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her.” Compliments and encouragement remind her of her value and help soften moments of tension.
Final Thought:
Navigating your wife’s emotions isn’t about fixing everything—it’s about being present, patient, and loving through the ups and downs. By seeking to understand her heart, validating her feelings, and leaning on God’s guidance, you’ll foster a deeper connection and create a home filled with love and safety.
Remember, marriage is a partnership where both individuals bring unique perspectives and experiences. As you navigate the complexities of emotion together, trust that God is shaping you both into better versions of yourselves and drawing you closer to Him and each other.
Romance is often seen as the heartbeat of a thriving marriage, but what happens when that spark seems to fade? Many couples find themselves in this place, where daily routines, responsibilities, and life’s pressures overshadow the affection and passion they once shared. If your marriage feels like it lacks romance, take heart. God designed marriage to be a reflection of His love for us (Ephesians 5:25), and with intentionality and effort, you can rekindle the flame.
1. Recognize That Romance Requires Intentionality
Romance doesn’t just happen naturally over time; it requires deliberate effort. Life gets busy, and if we’re not careful, we can drift into autopilot mode, neglecting the small gestures that keep love alive. Song of Solomon 7:10 reminds us of the beauty of pursuing one another: “I am my beloved’s, and his desire is for me.” Take ownership of reigniting romance by planning date nights, leaving sweet notes, or surprising your spouse with thoughtful acts of kindness. Even small efforts can make a big difference.
2. Communicate Openly About Your Needs
A lack of romance often stems from unspoken expectations or unmet needs. Instead of harboring frustration, have an honest yet gentle conversation with your spouse. Ephesians 4:29 encourages us to speak words that build up rather than tear down. Share how you feel without blaming or criticizing, and listen to your partner’s perspective. Healthy communication creates space for understanding and collaboration to restore intimacy.
3. Prioritize Emotional Connection
Physical romance flows out of emotional connection. If there’s distance between you and your spouse emotionally, it will likely affect your physical relationship too. Spend quality time together—without distractions—to reconnect. Ask about their dreams, fears, and joys. Pray together and seek God’s guidance for your marriage. Psalm 133:1 says, “How good and pleasant it is when God’s people live together in unity!” Cultivating emotional closeness lays a foundation for deeper romantic bonds.
4. Be Willing to Sacrifice Comfort Zones
Sometimes, the absence of romance comes from complacency or fear of stepping outside our comfort zones. Maybe you’ve stopped trying new things or expressing vulnerability because it feels awkward or risky. However, growth rarely happens within the confines of comfort. Be willing to initiate change—even if it feels uncomfortable at first. Whether it’s dressing up for dinner, writing a heartfelt letter, or planning a weekend getaway, stepping out of routine can breathe fresh energy into your marriage.
5. Seek God Together
Ultimately, true romance isn’t sustained by human effort alone—it’s fueled by God’s presence in your relationship. When couples prioritize their spiritual connection with Him, they invite His love to flow through their marriage. Malachi 2:15 says, “Has not the Lord made them one? In flesh and spirit, they are His.” Pray together, read Scripture, and ask God to renew your hearts toward each other. As you align yourselves with His purposes, He will restore joy and passion to your union.
Final Thought:
The absence of romance doesn’t mean your marriage is broken—it means it’s time to refocus and rebuild. Don’t wait for “someday” or assume things will improve on their own. With intentional action, open communication, and reliance on God, you can revive the romance in your marriage. Remember, marriage is a covenant—a lifelong commitment meant to reflect Christ’s unwavering love for the church. By choosing to nurture romance, you honor both your spouse and the divine design of marriage.
So today, take one step—no matter how small—to show your spouse they are still treasured. Love deeply, pursue passionately, and trust that God will bless your efforts to strengthen the bond you share.
